NO and I Hate Babies

We have a house for sale next door to us. Said house has been on the market for more than a year now. Many people have come looking, but it has yet to be purchased.

The last potential buyer came to my door asking about the neighborhood. I swear to you the first question out of his mouth was, "Is there an LDS church nearby?" I told him that I was not LDS but that there was a church just down the road. I asked him if he was new to Utah and he told me no and also informed me that his brother lived just down the street. Call me paranoid, but I think he wanted to know if I was LDS and just used that as a way to find out. Because, let's be honest, if you have lived in Utah your whole life and your brother lives down the street you know there is a church nearby. Am I right? Can I get an amen?

Cut to today. I am outside - minding my own business when I am approached by another potential buyer. Again, one of the first questions out of her mouth was, "Are you LDS?" First I want to thank her for making small talk with me before prying into my personal business. Second, I want to tell her no. And, I hate babies, apple pie and the smell of freshly washed laundry.

What gives here, people? First it is absolutely NOBODY'S business what religion I am. In fact I find that question to be almost as offensive as, "When are you due?" when, in fact, I am not pregnant.

Secondly, just because I am not Mormon does not mean I am not a good person. What the hell does my religion have to do with you buying the house next door to me? I promise when I smoke pot, cook meth, and get drunk on the weekends I won't make you do it.

I have absolutely NO problem with LDS people. I have wonderful neighbors - both LDS and non-LDS. But I truly resent the hell out of the fact that who or what I do or do not worship even factors in to any kind of conversation I have with you. Not YOU. Collective YOU. Unless YOU are one of those people who think they need to know that about me before befriending me.

Please, take me at face value. Get to know me. Get to know my family. Please don't make assumptions and please stop asking so many personal questions.